Aug 23, 2015

PUN-TASTIC

Very innovative..........puns for fun. Read along................

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

I don't trust these stairs because they're always up to something.

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food colour. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize.

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said 'No change yet'.

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tyred.

When the cannibal showed up late to the luncheon, they gave him the cold shoulder.

The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester.

It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.

Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run.

People are choosing cremation over traditional burial. It shows that they are thinking out of the box.


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